The bell above my door rings and my heart jolts in my chest, sending a rush of adrenaline through my veins. I am torn; comfortable in my state of near-hibernation, reluctant to move… But this is my first visitor in months, drawn in by the ever-burning flame at the top of my tower—a waypoint in the midst of this wretched, barren land.
The bell rings again, an impatient ding, ding, ding-ding-ding, and my irritation flares.
Well, that decides it.
My limbs tremble as I stand from my armchair. I run a bony hand over my old brown robes, wishing I had a mirror to check my appearance.
“Hello?” The voice calls from outside the front door—a young man, desperate, full of life. A shame it must be this way, but I have no choice in these days of hardship. I hurry forward, eagerness overcoming guilt, and open the door.
“Hello,” I say, giving my most welcoming smile. The young man flinches back and I no longer regret what must happen.
He recovers quickly, lips flickering upwards. “Oh, hello. Please excuse my intrusion, madam, it’s just—”
“Nonsense,” I say. “Come, come in. You must be cold.” I glance towards the snowy ground; is it winter already? I shiver and hug myself, feeling the hard outline of my ribs beneath my shrivelled breasts. It’s been too long since my last decent meal.
“I, uh…” The man’s eyes drift behind me, to the crackling fire beside my chair. He is hesitant but the sight of those comforts are evidently enough to convince him. He flashes me a brief, grateful smile. “Thank you.”
Fool.
I hold out my arms in welcome as he steps inside. “It’s my pleasure,” I say. “What news of the outside?”
“Ah, where to start,” he says, rubbing his hands together as he embraces the warmth. “The western borders have been abandoned, the queen has all but left us to our…” I close the door and lead him in, nodding at his tale even as his words wash over me.
The young man lets out a long, weary exhale as he sits down, sinking into the armchair opposite mine. A few moments seated by the crackling flames is all he needs for his exhausted body to relax into the depths of sleep.
I do what I must to ensure my survival.
Later, I sit beside the fire in my chair, alone once more.
I sip from my cup, sigh with satisfaction and wipe the red stain from my lips, wondering when my next visitor will arrive.
Lucy A. McLaren 
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